Ehh my face hurts,its more like my mouth but that just sounds wrong.It tis all numb,bloody,and swollen..so thus I look like a chipmunk and feel like hell,lovely combo isn't it?Well of course it is because it's not you who has to live with it...lucky assmunch.Anywhoo besides looking like a chipmunk I suppose its really not that bad,I can't really feel anything..yet.Hopefully though by ar least tommorow the swelling won't be as bad as it is now..and hopefully by sunday things will at least be semi normal..yes I'm a very hopeful person but who cares.Well I'm gettin tired so I guess I'll go lay down,laters.

So far away
But so close at heart.
If I could,
I'd take these miles and rip them apart.-Kc (August 12,2005)

Hm I haven't updated this in awhile lol.Letz see herez....nothing significant has happend for the past few weeks.Still dont have my camera -_-;; but hopefully I should be getting it by next week.Speaking of next week Friday the 12th I go to the dentist to get my wisdome teeth pulled *tear*.What sucks about that is,they arent even out yet so they have to dig for them @_@..but a releif thought is I'll be asleep so at least I wont feel it while their doing it.But anywhoo...umm I talked to Katie last night,she called to ask if I thought she was gothic because her b/f kept saying she was but she isnt lol.Ohs out of bordom last night I started playing this game called Phantom Dust,an at first I thought it'd be really gay cause it didnt really sound all that interesting but then after I started playing it,it doesnt really seem all that bad.The story of the game is that some weird dust collide around the earth and wiped out everything and everyone's memory so like then the human race fled underground with only the current memory of the ruins.So then they have certain people who have this abilty to return to the surface and search through the remains for these clue like things to restore their memory about what happend and how to make the above ground habitable again.During like the intro video to the game they find two guys in escape pods,one is Edgar and the other is the charater you'll be playing as..and according the head council known as the "visions" both of them have this amazing potential above the other roam landers of the underground in finding what they need.But yea its kinda long but thats the general idea.Anywhoo I gotta go so later.

Holy fuckin shit I swear to god I'm gonna pop! Just for the record..Mrs.Patricia..I fuckin hate you,your the biggest bitch with more issues then a burbon street crack whore in a slut house.But thats enough of that because I dont feel like thinking back on that shit right now,but while I'm getting everything out I might as well just say I'm tired of hearing "Jessica this and Jessica that" or "Chris this and Chris that".You know what? I'm glad you 2 are fuckin happy together an I love both of you but it still hurts and it is annoying...for fucking christ I am not Dr.Phil and I dont want to hear about every single fuckin detail in your relationship.Hmm what else do I have thats pissing me off that I need to vent out while I'm on the role???I have no fucking clue right now,I'm to pissed off and depressed right now to even think straight so I'm leaving-Kc

 "Its Been Awhile"
And it's been awhile
Since I could hold my head up high
And it's been awhile
Since I first saw you
And it's been awhile
Since I could stand on my own two feet again
And it's been awhile
Since I could call you

And everything I can't remember
As fucked up as it all may seem
The consequences that I've rendered
I've stretched myself beyond my means

And it's been awhile
Since I can say that I wasn't addicted
And it's been awhile
Since I can say I love myself as well
And it's been awhile
Since I've gone and fucked things up just like I always do
And it's been awhile
But all that shit seems to disappear when I'm with you

And everything I can't remember
As fucked up as it all may seem
The consequences that I've rendered
I've gone and fucked things up again

Why must I feel this way?
Just make this go away
Just one more peaceful day!

And it's been awhile
Since I could look at myself straight
And it's been awhile
Since I said I'm sorry
And it's been awhile
Since I've seen the way the candles light your face
And it's been awhile
But I can still remember just the way you taste

And everything I can't remember
As fucked up as it all may seem to be I know it's me
I cannot blame this on my father
He did the best he could for me

And it's been awhile
Since I could hold my head up high
And it's been awhile
Since I said I'm sorry

I dont know why I even bother getting my hopes up when I already had a feeling she wouldnt come.I mean her dad's a jerk an he flys down here every other week so he has no need to come here right?Whatever.If I didnt say it in a previouse post,my friend Katie who moved to Pennslyvania in December was supposed to come an visit me cause she was in Orlando visiting her dads side of the family and they said they'd come over here when they were done...they never did .Thats just a major mood shoot down right there..because for a second I was actually happy with the thought I'd get to see my bestest friend in the entire fuckin world again.But anyways,Matts supposidly gonna call me today so I guess I have something to be happy about.Umm other then that I don't think theres anything else,Brandons supposidly on his way home from Mississippi unless his mom changed her mind again -_-;;.Yea but anyways I'm gonna go.-Kc

Ehh nothing really happend today,unless you count the termite inspector dude coming over to look at our walls as special lol.I woke up twice cuz he had to keep coming in and lookin in my room so it was kinda annoying but when he finished I went back to sleep.Damn PMS!! I hate it it makes my tummy go ow...i sleep pretty damn good though because of it but still lol.Ummz I talked to Matt today so YAY! he's doin pretty good so thats cool,he got his ranking yesterday at some ROTC meeting umm I think it was 2nd lieutenat or somthing like that,I'm happy for him thoz.Okies so I found out my brother isnt completely lying,he's at least looking so I guess thats better than him just telling me what I wanna hear so I wont bug the crap outta him lol.As far as stuff with me and my g-ma goes,I'm about to like rip her fuckin head off or somthing because she's just pissing me off to the point where I can't stand it now.Like EVERY little thing I say she claims that I have an attitude with her,wtf?! No I don't thats her sarcastic ass trying to be funny and piss me off like she always does to see how much she can throw at me before I start knockin her lights out.She has me in fuckin counciling to help me..I dont need help I'm perfectly fine,what I do need if for someone to smack her upside the head and to tell her to stop being such a bitch about everything and to stop blaming everything on me for every little fuckin thing."Oh we dont talk enough" theres a REASON for that you idiot,because everytime I do try to talk to her she tries to put me on a guilt trip or some shit and I dont wanna hear all of that so I just walk away and she gets pissed and thats when we get into it.Things are better if we don't talk to each other because then I have my space and she can't piss me off and then we dont try to kill each other."I think its because we don't understand each other" thats because she's a stubborn old fashion woman and I'm a 15 year old who just doesnt give a shit what people think of me,she wants me to be perfect and I don't.But anyways thats enough of that,I dont feel like getting way worked up over that.Ummz Brandon called today,he's gettin pretty sick of being up there,I don't really blame him I mean he's been in Mississippi since summer started.His mom isnt letting him come back until the beggining of August..that just blows...major pee wee herman nuts.Enough of that also,I dont feel like being depressed right now.Ummz other then that there isnt really anything else other then I get like a bag full of dresses later cause Ashley cleaned out her closet (HOLY CRAP SHE CLEANED) XD moowahahaha.Anywhoo I gotta go so laterz-Kc

Okies,saturday was the all-nighter at skatecountry and I went for the first time in a long while,so it was cool.I hung out with Keith,Jessica for most of the night but every now and then I'd go an see what everyone else was up to.I saw Jerry for the first time in for like fuckin ever,his hair got longer an he got rid of his glasses lol.Jerad,Katie,Bob,Warren,Frankie,David,Jessie,Trey,and My little brother that I adopted were all there so I liked seein all them again cause they usually dont go anymore like they use too.Umm me,Keith,Jessica,and Katie were all being stupid when Craig started playing that song "Live Like You Were Dying" cause Keith is gay (literally) and likes country so we were all holding hands while singing an it was just great lol.Then Keith did the electric slide an had like these little kids stairing at him so he scared them off an that was funny to XD.After it was over Jessica,Keith,an me all walked to the corner an waited for our rides an like we sat across from Quizno's and Hookah Cafe' an like Keith was singin some weird little song that he heard for Quizno's cuz its Keith and he's special like that lol.He let us listen to his ring tones an he had "Milkshake" on his phone so like we stood up and stared dancing an these black ppl were lookin at us like "Wtf?" RANDOMNESS is ultimatly the shit.I liked this lil thingy he had on there it was somthing like "I woke up this morning with a hangover and found that my penis was missing,its detatchable,it happens all the time" it was kinda hard to hear but it was still one of those things that you hear an it just blows your mind lol.So finally my g-ma picks me an Jessica up and we drop her off then go home..as soon as I got in my room I just hit the bed and knocked the hell out lol.I think I woke up on and off though,either way I slept through most of the day.Now TODAY...my brother said he'd go get me a digi cam like he promised forever ago....he said its in lay away...I asked Ashley (his g/f) and she said no...so I have no fucking clue who to believe but knowing him he probably didn't because he's a retard like that.What really pisses me off though is that he said he'd get me the camera like FOREVER ago back when school was still in and like not even like 2 days ago he go's and gets my g-ma a fuckin DVD player...-_-...thats fuckin wrong.For one thing I know she's more than likely NEVER going to use it because she doesnt watch movies...she barly even watches tv.Her definition of watching tv is like laying on the sofa doing her crossword book while the tv's on...so yeah I seriously doubt if she ever uses it.But anywhoo I gotta go so later.-Kc

Haha,so the addiction spreads.For some odd reason I find these things fun O.o,Guess it keeps me occupied since there never seems to be anything else to do.But anywho,this seems to be a little better than xanga I guess cause theres more you can do,but its just a tad bit more confusing cause like I always seem to have trouble finding what I'm looking for >.< blah! Okies just so anyone who reads this knows,most of my posts probably will be alot of pissed off,depressing,venting cause thats just how most of my days seem to go,and on those rare occasions its actually happy ones! But basicly if your going to read this then thats cool but if your going to read it and then leave me some stupid comment about how I'm stupid,lame,etc..then do both of us a favor and just stop reading because for one I didnt make you read it and two I'm not writing for your enjoyment.This is just for me to write my thoughts out and anyone who is interested may read but if your going to then do so silently,I dont mind comments,but I dont like having my time wasted by dumbasses who post stupid shit.Mkay but thats enough of that,I think I've made myself fairly clear.Anywhoo I'm gonna go cause other than that there isnt anything to update about.